Excuses. I think I keep making them.
I think I keep making them as I am actually enjoying eating rubbish food. There, I said it. I like the taste of rubbish food!
Actually, I don’t. I like the taste of lovely, healthy, delicious food that takes me closer to my goal…I just cannot be bothered to cook it for some reason. In fact even if it has been cooked for me by the wonderful Mr WLB, I just cannot be bothered to eat it – and am opting for carb-sugar-laden goodies (baddies!) instead.
So what do I do? How do I stop myself from slipping back towards where I started?
I guess I need to stop making excuses and man up!
I have spent enough time now settling into my new job. I can’t use that as an excuse anymore. I need to crack on!
There is always a reason. I am great at finding reasons (excuses!) as to why I can’t do something. These reasons (excuses!) stop me from pursuing my dream; they stop me from taking action. I can make my reasons (excuses!) sound very reasonable – I can get sympathy and understanding from people…which then helps me to justify my lack of action.
I convince myself that it’s okay as my life has changed and I just need to take some time to adapt. But whilst I am taking some time to adapt my weight keeps going up…as the junk keeps going in. You know how honest I am – if I have an undeserved weight gain then I own up. Whilst some of the weight that I have gained feels undeserved, I know that I have not been doing what I know works…I deserve the results that I am getting at the moment; or the results that I am not getting at the moment!
So I am ditching the excuses and getting back to work.
“Excuses are the nails used to build a house of failure.” - Don Wilder
Do any of these sounds familiar?
“I don’t have enough time.”
“It’s too hard”
“I’m too tired.”
“I’ll start tomorrow, next week, next month, next year.”
“I’m too busy.”
“What if I fail?”
“I have too much on my plate.”
“Too many people have already tried and failed.”
“People tell me it can’t be done.”
“This isn’t the right time.”
And it never will be. If I keep telling myself that it’s okay to not be making progress then it will never be my time. I will fail. It won’t be done and those people will be right. I will never have enough time if I don’t find the time.
I read somewhere that excuses aren’t really reasons, they’re just how we justify not pursuing what we want in life – and that we can only succeed when we stop telling ourselves why we can’t, and start living a life that shows we can.
Maybe that’s something to think about?
I guess I just need to get excited about it all again.
It was easy to be excited as the weight was dropping off. It was easy to be excited when I started going out to the theatre, doing things like rock-climbing and canoeing, shopping for new clothes, being able to take my niece and nephew out…starting my new job.
I need to light myself up again – to coin a cheesy American article I read recently – I need to get excited!
I am wasting time and energy worrying about my excuses – worrying about what’s going to happen if I don’t start taking action. This time and energy that I spend worrying could be spent on doing something constructive.
An article on Mind, Body, Green – written by Ashley Cebulka – talked about how to stop making excuses…and one of the key components linked to getting excited – or lit up. It said, ‘Just like anything else, the more you give energy to something, the more life it has and it naturally grows bigger. This is the basics in the power of focus. So if you want to take risks and actually do more of what you love, you’re going to need to get comfortable moving through your excuses, because they’ll inevitably show up.’
There was a little exercise in that article which is something that I have used with my coaching clients – and myself – and I thought that I would share it with you, as it might help you ditch an excuse that you are holding on to…
Write down one of your biggest excuses in life. The words you hear yourself think or even say out loud on a regular basis when it comes to WHY you can’t do something you really desire.
Next, ask yourself what excitement would be brewing inside of you and trying to rise to the surface if you weren’t scared. Hint: the excitement is underneath the fear …
Last, how could you turn that excitement into an empowering statement?
1. Excuse: “I’ll probably just fail and it won’t work out.” Take a moment really breathe through it, feel the fear in your belly and wherever else it shows up in your body. Now ask, “What excitement is trying to rise to the surface?”
2. Excitement: “The possibility of being authentically happy, doing what I love, excites me beyond belief.”
3. New empowering statement: “I am authentically pursuing my passions and successfully doing what I love.”
BAM! Now we’re talking. Can you feel that? The excitement and joy you feel as the possibilities brews inside you? This is what we call inspiration, and this can be your new source for taking action.
So I bet you’ve gathered that the above words aren’t mine…they come from the article. I am not really a ‘BAM!’ kind of girl. I am trying to embrace this kind of thing as I have seen it work for others.
I am a massive fan of positive psychology though – and if you’ve read a few of my blog posts now you might have seen me write about people like Martin Seligman and his Three Blessings, or the 100 Happy Days project.
It’s positive to be positive!
So don’t dismiss what is written above – albeit cheesily written – Ashley encourages you to, ‘lean into that inspiration’ writing down three steps you could take with that excitement leading the way.
Come up with a new statement you can affirm to yourself when those old stories of fear and excuses attempt to creep back in. Remind them that you’re changing and you’re not into feeding energy toward those old excuses anymore. Over time those excuses will naturally dissipate and your new way of being will come into fruition.
You are enough. Exactly as you are right now, in this moment to do what you love. You have what it takes inside you to live your dreams. Trust that.
As a matter of fact, a great affirmation is “I trust myself and I trust the process.” Now you have put the power in your hands and boosted your confidence.
So here’s a virtual cheers to having a different conversation with our excuses. One that empowers us and helps us realise just how incredible it can be to move through the fear and taste the sweet rewards of what makes us who we are.
And yes, those few paragraphs above were not written by me either – in fact, I am going to go back and put them in italics so that you know what is mine and what isn’t!
So that’s it for tonight then…I have just lost the last paragraph of this so am going to stop tinkering with it! I actually wrote this last week and left it alone…I tried to ditch the excuses – and the guilt that goes with them. That was a few days ago. Since then I have had a few good days. I lost 2lbs today…maybe there’s something in this excuses malarkey?
Thank you for reading,
Weight Loss Bitch xxx