As it says on the tin…I managed to claw back my 10st award today with a rather hefty 6lbs loss.
So that’s a total loss of 10st 2.5lbs now. I was pretty happy with that! It’s a loss of 30lbs in the past 7 weeks which isn’t too shabby at all.
More importantly, I haven’t gone on a binge-eating spree in the past 7 weeks either. And that is a massive deal for me.
My roller-coaster weight-loss graph looks like this:
And I guess the reason that I am not getting overly-excited is based on the above. I have had great periods of losses before and then have a tendency to fuck it up. You can see – if you look really closely – that the beginning of the graph is up and down like crazy. Then I got my shit together and sailed along for a couple of years – losing over 21st. And last year it went to shit and I was up and down again…but it was much harder to deal with as I had experienced the success of blitzing the weight loss. It was also much harder to control as I would have really good weeks and really bad weeks and the yo-yo losses and gains were really hard and left me feeling shattered and pissed off with myself. I was either manically happy as I had lost a big chunk, or not wanting to get out of fucking bed as I had gained a big chunk. It was quite an exhausting year – and throw in two job changes and life shit going on…well, it’s not a year I want to repeat!
It would have been so easy for me to just think, ‘Fuck it!’ and regain the lot. Give up work. Eat myself to death – which is what was on the cards when I first started this back in 2012. The real challenge came with the binge-eating…that is a battle that I will always be fighting I think. I have had a lot of messages from people who share this challenge, so I will write about it this weekend when I can spend more time thinking about what might help…and when I haven’t had a shitty day at work and my eyes hurt from analysing data all afternoon!
Anyway - I guess the moral of the story is that it’s easy to shift weight when you are in the right head-space. The difficulty is maintaining it. I have never mastered that. I am good at losing it, and very fucking good at gaining it! I am hoping to work on developing habits and an environment that support the change I want to achieve and maintain. And this is another blog post in itself…how to create that environment and tackle some of the shit that is stopping you.
On that note, I will wrap up for the evening and get planning a couple of ‘deep’ posts!
Todays food was tasty:
Breakfast – boiled eggs…eaten after weigh-in and before the gym!
Lunch – smoked salmon, olives, avocado, cucumber, spring onion, and baby plum tomatoes.
Dinner – chorizo chicken with spinach, tenderstem broccoli, mushrooms, a veggie ratatouille.
Thank you for reading – and for your ongoing support!