Last night was perfect…a nicely comfortable tummy, which was enjoying the ‘fake’ KFC style burgers I made, courtesy of Quorn southern burgers, and the new Slimming World magazine…just perfect! Well, Jake Gyllenhaal wouldn’t have gone amiss…but it was close to perfect! I get so excited when the new magazines come out; I do worry about myself sometimes. They are full of lovely recipe ideas and I love reading the success stories. When I was lighter, I used to read through them to find people who had lost the same amount of weight that I wanted to lose, so that I could see how different they looked! It was my way of visualising the loss. A bit difficult now though, as you don’t see many losing 30st+, but each and every story inspires me regardless, as we all have our own demons to battle…and lots of the bloody demons are shared irrespective of what starting weight you were!
I loved the tiny piece on page 15 which was titled, ‘Change your tune’ – it was about the power of music. According to Dr Lissa Rankin, optimists are 45% less likely to get sick and 77% less likely to die of heart disease than pessimists. A suggestion to improve your mood was to play your happiest music – as it helps you to look on the bright side and seek out solutions. Well, after reading this, my iPod went on charge!
Music is so powerful. In Ancient Greek religion and myth, Orpheus was a legendary musician, poet, and prophet. Apparently he had the ability to charm all living things – even stones – with his music. Eurydice, his wife, met an untimely death on their wedding day. Orpheus was overcome with grief; so much so that his sad and mournful songs made nymphs and gods weep. They advised him to travel to the underworld, where his music softened the hearts of Hades and Persephone…resulting in their agreement for Eurydice to return to earth – with one condition. However, Orpheus’ anxiety got the better of him and he broke that condition; he looked back to see if Eurydice was following him before they had left the underworld…she was immediately taken from him, never to return. Maybe there is a lesson here – something about not looking back?!
Hans Christian Andersen said, “Where words fail, music speaks”. I never used to understand people who became emotional when listening to music. For me, music was always a way of expressing my energy. I remember dancing around as a child in the front room of the house I grew up in. We had a huge cabinet which had full length glass doors, and I used to strut my stuff in front of it so I could watch myself dancing…to UB40, various reggae hits (Zungu Zeng by Yellowman was a favourite!), Bob Marley, Eurythmics, Madonna, Donna Summer, Simply Red, Genesis…my Mum and Dad had eclectic taste! I even remember winning a dancing competition – my prize was a pack of felt-tipped pens…a big concertina pack that reached the floor – I thought I was the bomb.
My teen-angst years were filled with Cyprus Hill…”insane in the membrane, insane in the brain!” I particularly liked playing the song ‘A to the K’ just because it had the word, ‘motherfucka’ in it! I wasn’t a pot-head or a rebel…just a tomboy who hung around with lads who liked this music. But their parents wouldn’t let them listen to it, whereas mine were fairly liberal. I think my parents were right really – letting me listen to it made me realise that it was a load of shite…whereas keeping it away from me would have made me even more determined to listen to it. I can only apologise to my parents and neighbours for putting them through that. My Dad was a proper connoisseur of music and had top of the range speakers, amplifiers, tuners etc – so they all had the benefit of Cypress Hill at their best!
I then moved on to The Fugees, before discovering the world of Mixmag and house music. And that was it; I became a bit of a club-head and DJs and their skills rather than artists were my thing. Shimmying my thang was not something that I was shy about; in fact if I wasn’t on a podium somewhere, then there was a problem. People used to comment, but in a good way, about my dancing prowess…so much so that I ended up with a Kylie complex. Thankfully, I never went near a pair of gold hotpants – so the eyes of my fellow clubbers were spared! A particularly fond memory of a night at Cream in Liverpool sticks in my mind…it was rather mental and Brandon Block and Alex P were involved…I think. And no, I was never a drug-taker, just a tequila drinker. I knew a few DJs though, so VIP lists and DJ meets were fun!
Certain songs stick in your mind. I remember trying to dance seductively to bloody Christina Aguilera and ‘Genie in a bottle’…to try and snare a doorman. What the hell was I thinking – a) Genie in a fecking bottle?! b) seductively?! and c) the doorman ended up having a voice like Alvin from the Chipmunks!! Then there was the song that the chap I lost my virginity too liked – ‘Fools Gold’ by the Stone Roses. He was a fool and so was I…I believed that he was moving to Poland the following week – which he had told me – and that I would never see him again. So the deed was done – incredibly unsatisfactorily – and the following week he turned up at the place we all drank and told his mates all about it! I was mortified…yet I am telling you…I guess I have shared more shocking news that the fact I lost my virginity to a guy who tricked a 19 year old me! He was still talking about it over a year later…I can only assume that he was rather pleased with himself…whilst I had moved on with my ex. The fool told my ex to look after me as I was the best thing he had met. Hmmm!
Anyway – the ex was lovely and we still talk. I wasn’t bothered when he outed himself a few years ago; I kind of had an inkling! He was a good looking guy – having been told by numerous people that he looked like Justin Timberlake – yet only had one girlfriend after we split and not many dalliances…in over ten years. And that one short-lived girlfriend was awful – ditzy and rude – and he was not that sort of chap at all…she was his ‘beard’…as was I, and I actually have a better beard than he did – thanks, PCOS! The song that reminds me of him is that one with Ali G and Madonna; him and his girl mate used to dance to it…and bless him, he was not a good dancer, so it just brings back memories of bad dancing and his strange friend!
‘Get Get Down’ by Paul Johnson holds another memory. Of me dancing with a friend and literally dancing with our bums as close to the floor as we could. He fell over and so did I – and then a lovely group of Chinese students tried to pick me up. Although, bless them, they were rather small and I am rather large…so it wasn’t an entirely successful venture! Then Beyonce and ‘Bootylicious’ hit the decks and oh my, I thought it was written for me. Apparently the delightful Beyonce wrote this song during a ‘fat’ period of her life and wanted to empower others. Little did she know that a future Weight Loss Bitch really was empowered…and shaking it for all to see. Goodness me, those were the days…and thank god that camera phones weren’t as available as they are now!
4 Strings and ‘Take me away’ is the tune that reminds me of my other half. He was well into his dance music and went to uni in Derby…so had a number of clubbing opportunities on his doorstep via ‘Progress’. He is truly an awful dancer – and he can’t sing either – but loves his music and I love him immensely…especially as he puts on special dance shows for my entertainment! I remember him heading back to see his mate in Derby for a weekend – I was expecting him to be away for a couple of days, so imagine my surprise when he climbed into bed with me later. He had caught a taxi from Derby – a bloody epic journey – as he had tripped over his own feet whilst dancing and badly twisted his ankle. It was the size of a football, black and purple in colour, and incredibly painful. It wasn’t the first, or the last, time that he tripped over his own feet.
We both have a love of music, but I wouldn’t exactly call it a shared love. We like different things, which is fine and healthy. Although I have managed to convince him that Eminem is a genius…and he likes a few of his productions – ‘Ass like that’ being a favourite! Songs for us remind us of our shared experiences. Driving around Scotland listening to James Morrison and Paulo Nutini. Or a rare dance tune that we plan on playing at our wedding.
I now understand why people become emotional when listening to music. My Dad played a song by ‘Mike and the Mechanics’ when my Grandad died…and it became ‘his’ song. I cry now when I never really used to understand the words. ‘Pink’ has some powerful lyrics in her music and I often get emosh listening to them. David Grey has had me in tears too. I am just a big softie! But stick a bit of ‘Bootylicious’ on and a strange thing happens…I get happy, feel all powerful, and I just have to move! The same happens when I hear Lady G and ‘Born this way’. I make music a part of my life. It cheers me up, and it allows me to have a good cry. So instead of reaching for the junk food if I am feeling emotional, I will stick on the music and have a good cry…and it does feel like a good cry! Or if I am feeling down, I stick on my positive tunes and I often have a little boogie. Give it a try – it works…and it’s much kinder on the scales too!
Right then, the usuals…
Again, we woke up before the alarm – this early morning energy is shocking me! We grabbed breakfast and headed off to the horses and then to Asda. I then grabbed an early lunch before heading back to the stables for a cleaning and tidying session. My Mum and I ended up binning lots of rubbish, which filled Freddie to the gills, and I took it all to the tip! I do like to be organised but my mobility meant that it was difficult for me to get stuck in…but now that my mojo is returning, I can get more done. We – Mum and I – then went to see my niece and nephew for babysitting duty. They were both on fine form and it was good to see them. It was then home for my Aussie soaps and a quiet night of blog writing.
Breakfast: Porridge with almond milk (1 x HEB and 1 x HEA) and a banana.
A gorgeous food day! Brekkie was quite straightforward. Lunch was lovely and quick – ratatouille, mixed beans, garlic and curry powder – with sweet potato wedges. Dinner was our take on the meatball jambalaya in the new Slimming World mag. Although we used Uncle Bens golden veg rice (2.5 syns) and the Asda meat free meatballs (3 syns for the bag)…we couldn’t get the Quorn ones which are syn free. I also forgot the spice mix, so used Cajun instead…but it was delicious!
Exercise: Two trips to the horses – but I wasn’t as active as I could have been up there…naughty!
Thank you for reading, lots of squishy hugs,
Weight Loss Bitch xxx