Santa is going to be incredibly pleased with me this year! Not only have I (when I say ‘I’ what I really mean is that I directed and my boyfriend ‘did’!) decluttered the house and threw away loads of old junk and donated the ‘good but no longer useful to us’ stuff to charity, but I also managed to hit my Christmas target and am now 8 stone lighter!
Goodness knows how I managed it as after last weeks nightmare of throwing up and having a dodgy tummy, that same cycle repeated itself again! Having put on 2lbs and being told that non of the ill members had a loss, I wasn’t anticipating losing 7.5lbs with a nearly identical week of time spent either in the bathroom or in bed. When I first stepped on the scales the numbers kept flitting so I knew I was nearly halfway between the lb that I needed, however it settled at the higher number and I was gutted…much to the disgust of the ‘never seen a smile on their faces’ weigh in ladies who thought that I was having a tantrum over nothing! They didn’t seem to realise how important it was to me to hit that target and wouldn’t let me weigh myself again as they said it had already registered…I did get back on anyway, but it wouldn’t work. So off I went in a huff until my lovely consultant spotted me and said that I could of course try again and all they had to do was take the card out and put it back in again…how helpful we’re they?! I love my consultant to pieces though, so as she dispatched me off to try and have a wee – which ended up being the tiniest wee in history – she sorted out the weigh in ladies and I got back on the scales, delighted to point out to them the extra .5 of a lb that I’d lost!! I think my consultant was happier than I was – but I am genuinely thrilled as I really wanted to lose 8 stone this year, not only for myself and my health, but for my family who worry about me, and my lovely Mum who’s supporting me financially, and my lovely boyfriend who wants us to travel the world together when I’m able to. Not forgetting the beautiful horses I have sitting in their field waiting for me to do something with them…although, to be honest, I think they’re happy being giant lawnmowers!
All I need to do now is stay in control over the festive period. Those of you SW members will remember the little 12 weeks of Christmas card that your consultants gave you, on which you could write your Christmas wish. Well, I was greedy – irony?! – and wrote two wishes, which were to lose 8 stone in time for the New Year weigh in (although I really wanted it before Christmas!) and to stay in control. So the second element of that needs work! It’s going to be hard, as I obviously wouldn’t have got to the size I am if I wasn’t a greedy git, and the same goes for my food loving family, all of whom are also overweight. Luckily, my Mum knows how important this is to me and, as she is also on SW, we are going to enjoy a nice SW Christmas dinner complete with her very tasty syn free roasts, low syn sausages wrapped in bacon, a pile of veggies and lots of yummy turkey! She has also promised a seafood starter – I love seafood – and, for those who want it, there will be pudding, but knowing my recent eating capability, I will be very full by then and won’t want it. I’ve also been promised a syn free doggie bag so I can have a HEB wholemeal turkey roll for supper!! Boxing Day will be a quiet one and I’m planning on doing a turkey and vegetable soup to keep things quite light as my weigh in is the following morning. After weigh in is when things are going to take a turn for the worse and will require all of my willpower, as we’re having a family party and my sister – who is also on SW but not really wanting to get focused again until the New Year – will go all out on party food and when I asked if there was any SW friendly stuff, she said “not really”! So I’m hoping to get some nice smoked salmon, roast beef, turkey and gammon to take, along with couscous, pasta salad, mini roast potatoes and some salad. I will also take the obligatory pickles too! I have said that I will have a few bits but I really don’t want to start eating that sort of stuff, or I’m afraid that I might not stop! Savoury cheese balls, mini spring rolls, Austrian smoked cheese, onion bhajis, samosas and trifle are not going to control me this year…I want to start 2013 in a positive frame of mind, having had a lovely Christmas spent with my family and not having ruined my good work!
This week at class SW members have been enjoying their Christmas buffets. Ours was always going to be interesting given that it’s a morning group and not many people feel like tucking into savoury stuff first thing. However we finish nearer lunchtime, so it was interesting to see what people had bought. Lots of WW cakes, low syn crisps, a big fruit salad, jelly and jelly mixed with yogurt – which is one of my favourites if I want a sweet fix – but the nicest thing I tried was a soup made with vegetables, curry powder and red lentils that had been blended; it was lovely and creamy and the small taste I had was quite filling. I always want to use more lentils but don’t really know what to do with them, so this recipe is definitely going on the list! Another lovely lady had made a butternut squash and sweet potato soup with pepper that had a lovely kick to it and wasn’t too sweet. It was really nice to just sit and get the chance to talk to some of the other members. I got lots of lovely compliments on my weight loss and people mentioned that you can definitely see the difference in not only how I look but also in the way I move – at over 43 stone when I started, my mobility was severely limited and I used to have to sit and have a breather on the chair outside before I could go in, and also used to have to sit down immediately after being weighed and couldn’t stand in line. Whereas now, I do queue up if there are a few people and don’t have to have my breather anymore! My boyfriend made an interesting observation about us SW foodies…he said at other buffets he’s been to, people hold back before heading up to the food table, but when the consultant told us to go and get something to eat, there was a little stampede…once a food lover, always a food lover I guess (I’ll save the debate about whether we are food lovers or food abusers for another day!)
Another positive thing that happened this week was the shower I took. Whilst most of you will wonder what the big deal is, at my heaviest I couldn’t use the shower at home and actually used to strip off in the barn at the stables and have a seated shower using the portable horse shower hooked up to a gas bottle and the hosepipe! Crazy – but it was better than having to get someone to wash me! So, this week I had a shower at home – I’ve had a few recently – but this one was the longest shower I’ve had in ages and I was able to stand for a lot longer than I used to be able to do. I then put on some lovely body oil spray from The Sanctuary and got my other half to put some cream on my feet (which I still can’t reach – but oh so nearly can!)…it felt lovely to have my little pamper session and I will be repeating it many times over the festive season to give me something else to focus on. Now that we have decluttered I have found loads of lotions and potions and nail varnish stuff, so I’m going to use this all as a distraction technique and to help me learn to love myself again, as keeping clean was purely a need to do thing at my heaviest rather than something to be enjoyed and treated like a treat to myself! It’s quite sad in a way, but I want to focus on moving forwards and try not to think about how bad it was, but I guess it’s good to reflect on how far I’ve come and, given how far I still have to go, imagine how much better things are going to get!
I was a little bit upset earlier this week when my niece asked me to come and see her ‘display’ at nursery. They were reading a Christmas story and singing Christmas songs and family members could go and watch. I would loved to have gone, but used the excuse that I had to sort out the horses and get to my SW class, but truth be told it was because I didn’t want to embarrass myself or her and didn’t want other children taking the mickey out of her for having a fat aunty! I was worried that you can’t park near the entrance, and that it would be too far for me to walk, and that there would only be nursery sized chairs (which there were according to my sister, who was worried about how her bum hung over the edge!) and that I’d get all hot and sweaty etc! I would absolutely have loved to have been there for her – she had the only solo speaking part! – but am determined to attend future events when I’m able to! Luckily for me it had been recorded, so she sat with me and gave me a blow by blow account, accompanied by her singing at random, when I got back from class and she even allowed me to wear the tiara she had made out of green cardboard and sticky stars!!
Anyway, that’s me done for this week. So, to the few lovely people who read this, I truly wish you all a wonderful Christmas and hope that you get all you wish for!
Lots of love,